Today is the memorial service for my Uncle. Since he lived several states away, and there was a service for him in there we've had to wait over a week to have our memorial service for him. Today his ashes are being buried next to his parents.





I've been thinking about my Uncle alot over the past week. He was an average guy. He was on his second marriage; the first ending when I was a kid and it was aparently was not a great one. His first wife was manipulative and it ended harshly. And because of that my Uncle and his son did not see each other or speak for a very long time. My uncle was not by any means an attentive Uncle. He was living his life and though family & friends were important to him he was not a kid kind of guy, so I always assumed.





He moved away when I was perhaps in 5th grade so I was not particularly close to him but I still charished him because at that time (why "at that time" is a long story for another time) he was my only Uncle and that was important to me. We rarely saw him once he moved. He was living his life in the south and that is where he was happy. He'd say he was going to visit but never would. In recent years though, he found his second wife, reconciled with his son and started to come visit at least once a year. And this is the part I have really been thinking about, my time with him.





Though my time with him was limited I felt extremely comfortable with him. Perhaps comfortable is not the right world because we are supposed to feel comfortable around our family. I felt.....real, honest, me. I really felt like I could be myself, the self that has seemed to have taken a backseat over the past few years. The self that is honest and blunt but funny, grounded and realistic but caring despite the bluntness. I'm not sure what it was about my Uncle that made me able to be that way. Maybe because that is part of who he was too, blunt and honest but yet funny and caring. I felt like he got it, when I was blunt with him he knew how to laugh at it and yet know I meant well but just didn't know the pretty way to say things.





I'm not sure if I am explaining all of this right. All I know is that I could be the self that I respected and missed when I was with my Uncle and he got it and appreciated it. I will truly miss my Uncle.

Love you, Uncle J